Raising Your Baby “Gender Neutral”? Here’s What To Think About

From the moment a woman sees two lines on a pregnancy test, a million different thoughts start running through her mind. She is thinking about possible baby names, what she wants to put on the registry and how she wants to decorate the nursery. The baby may not even have fingernails yet, but mom-to-be has all of these plans and thoughts.

As her pregnancy gets closer to the end, she may start to think about what kind of mother she wants to be. She will go over the different parenting styles, and ways to raise a child, and she realizes that she has to narrow it down soon. The baby is coming, and this is when all of her ideas have to come to fruition.


One of the ways she may want to raise her baby is “gender-neutral.” This is a type of parenting that has become more popular in recent years, and mom may be wondering if this is right for her and her child. In order to make the best decision, mom needs to be informed about what it really means to raise a child in a gender-neutral fashion, and there are some things that she may want to think about.

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What Is Gender Neutral Parenting?

Before mom can decide if this is the right kind of parenting for her, she needs to make sure that she understands the basic definition of it, and what it means. According to Parents, gender-neutral parenting can take many forms, and there are versions that are stricter than others. It all depends on the parents’ intentions and preferences to how far they decide to go with it.

The stricter forms of gender-neutral parenting involve parents who don’t give any idea of ​​what the “sex” of their child is. They don’t announce a gender, they don’t use she/his pronouns when talking about their child, and they never tell anyone if their child is a “boy” or a “girl.” This is a more extreme version.

Those who choose to go with a milder form of this parenting often just leave the gender-specific choices up to their child as they grow. They expose them to all different kinds of products, for boys and girls, and they are free to choose what they feel comfortable with.

The Benefits Of Gender-Neutral Parenting

When making any kind of decision, especially one as big as this, it is important to know the benefits and the potential risks of a decision. Parents who are struggling with this decision may want to know what the benefits are for their child, and it can help them make a decision in an informed way. This is not just something you decide for the day, it is a commitment that you are making, and according to Baby Couture, there are some benefits to gender-neutral parenting.

  • The most obvious benefit is that your child will have the freedom to explore who they are, and they won’t feel pressured to “fit” into a certain box. They can express how they feel, whatever that may be.
  • There will be more hobbies and interests that are opened up to them and this can grow their skills and enhance their development.
  • They are sensitive to the interests, likes, and challenges of both sexes, and this can help them be empathetic to those who are different from them. They will grow up with an unbiased view of the world.

Drawbacks Of Gender-Neutral Parenting

Just as there are benefits to gender-neutral parenting, there are also some potential drawbacks that mom has to think about. These may not apply to every family, and they may not even be a “big deal” to every family, but they are worth considering. Every family is different and is going to have different concerns. According to Being The Parent, these are the potential drawbacks of this style of parenting:

  • They could face some pressure from society, and there is a chance that they will be bullied when they are older. This is something to take into consideration when it comes to your child’s future mental health.
  • The outside world may not be very gender-neutral, so mom may have a hard time finding “girlie” clothes that are made for her biological son to wear.
  • If children go to school with a gender-specific uniform, it may be hard for them to find the right uniform to wear.

According to Family Education, there are other challenges to think of. When a lot of families want to raise their children gender-neutral, they don’t assign them a pronoun, and this can be confusing. If your child knows that mom goes by “she” and dad goes by “he,” it can be confusing for them. This applies to other people in their lives, and in the community when they don’t have a pronoun to use for themselves. While none of this may be a mark against the style of parenting for you, it is a list of possible complications that need to be thought about.

Celebrities Are Doing It

While many may not like to admit it, they do look to celebrities for influence. Celebrities also have a platform to share, and this means that what they say matters in the world, and it can make a difference for parents all over the world. According to She Knows, there have been a lot of celebrities out there who have decided to raise their children in a gender-neutral manner, with some being stricter than others.

Pink and Kate Hudson are two big-name celebrities that have announced that they are raising their children gender-neutral, but they have said that they are taking a “traditional” approach to pronouns. This means that they are using pronouns for their children because they feel like gender-neutral is a label in itself and that no one can live completely without labels. They seem to be taking a less serious form of gender-neutral parenting, compared to others who choose to refer to their babies as “theybies” until they are old enough to state what gender they want to use.

Like most decisions in parenting, this is a very serious decision and something that needs to be thought about by parents before their baby is born. It is clear that it is a spectrum, and there are no rules on how serious mom and dad have to be with it.

Sources: Parents, Baby Couture, Being The Parent, Family Education, She Knows

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